I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I'm just crazy horny about you
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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