So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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