i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
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