This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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