She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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