I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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