White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
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