bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Randomize
