Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Sacagawea was the original milf.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
