loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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