thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Randomize
