you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
