Midget sex pt 2 tonight
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
