your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I think a kid would responsible me up
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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