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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Are my feet made of real feet?
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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