burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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