I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
I need to calm my uterus...
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
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