alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Randomize
