She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
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