i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize
