I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Randomize