Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Randomize
