dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Randomize