I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
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