So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
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