Your favorite bartender is back from prision
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Randomize