even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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