She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
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