I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Randomize
