This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
