have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
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