NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
