He is such a slut. More and more my type.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
