Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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