There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
