i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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