HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Randomize
