if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
