I'm so fucking centered right now
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Randomize