I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
