I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
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