the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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