This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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