She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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