Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
