Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
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