GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
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