How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
