never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
It's official drugs can't kill me
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
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