Buhtt sex?
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
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dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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