Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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